Stress

Last modified on: 08/08/06

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Relaxation: An Imperative

I think one of the reasons it's hard to relax is that it seems like everything else (particularly those thigns causing whatever stress) is so much more important and demands attention. Relaxing seems like a waste of time, but there's nothing much else in life more important than relaxing. I've been learning this the hard way as I begin to realize how many of my difficulties in life have been caused by stress. For example, just about every physical ailment I have ever experienced, including ulcers, indigestion, chronic fatigue, frequent colds, and chest pains, can be traced back to the physiological effects of stress, which include vasoconstriction, lowered immunity, and increased body acidity. Further, many of these effects, I see, have been mediated by shallow breathing. Simply sitting back, closing my eyes, and breathing deeply is probably the most important skill I'll ever learn. It's so simple. It doesn't seem like enough to address my stress, but sometimes big problems have small solutions, and we just don't find those solutions because we can't believe it's that simple. Knowing how crucial it is, both for my health and for my productivity in life, just to be able to relax has made it easier to sit down and do it.

Magic Day of No More Problems?

I realize I have been waiting for that magic day when all my stress would go away, but there will always be something in my life causing stress. It shows that I am getting the most out of life. I spend a lot of time trying to solve all my problems and arrive at that point beyond which no problems exist. Now I realize that the solution to all my problems is learning not to need a solution. My goal is to take things as they come, do what I need to do, and just keep doing that, and learn to live that way and still be happy.

Ambience

Much of mood is ambience, or atmosphere. Even when I feel tense over a pressing concern, my mood still responds to things as simple as soft music, sunshine and grass, warm blankets, and cozy corners.

Reduce Your Load

I make a list of absolutely everything I have to do, then I scratch out everything I don't absolutely have to do. Sometimes I think we overload ourselves with tasks and errands that we could live without, and because those monstrous "To Do" lists are so impossible, we end up doing absolutely nothing. If I can survive like that (and I have), I can survive with a few items scratched out. The funny part is that when the stress of a dozen tasks on my list is gone, I often end up getting those things done anyway.

Relaxation Techniques

Relaxation exercises may not eliminate stressful circumstances, but they can eliminate stress.

The following relaxation exercises are classic in psychology and stress management. They're a little cliche now but very effective anyway.

Stress Inoculation

Stress inoculation is a category of techniques most commonly taught to surgery patients, burn victims, and children with leukemia for relieving physical pain. However, it can also be applied to emotional pain and stress. There are two main techniques. Distraction: This is simply a matter of thinking about something else. Imagine a beautiful place or focus your attention on a point or object in space. Meaning: Look at the meaning of your distress. Discover a purpose for your discomfort and concentrate on that purpose during your experience.

Breath

Focus your attention on your breathing. One of the purposes of this technique is to counteract the tendency to hold your breath when under stress. Another purpose is to take deep breaths at a slow rate, which helps your body wind down from a stress reaction.

Count To Ten

When steam is rising from your face and your teeth are showing, counting to ten really does work. If counting to ten is too mundane for you, try describing your surroundings. That is what works for me. For example, you might say, "I'm standing in a large room near a window, and I can see the sky, which is really clear today." If that doesn't work... hell, try growling! It works for Worf!

Muscle Tensing

This exercise involves progressively tensing your muscles for a few seconds then releasing, beginning by tensing the hands or feet and end with the whole body. Stretching also produces a relaxing effect.

Facial Massage

You may find yourself doing this naturally, because it really helps to relieve mental tension, especially if you've been concentrating for a long period of time. Instead of just focusing on the temples though, include the forehead, cheeks, and neck.

Visualization

Visualization is a way of simulating a calming environment.

Imagine a place that feels very comfortable and serene. This can be a natural area or a cozy room. You can recall a place in memory, or you can create your own ideal place in imagination. Develop the details of this imaginary place and mentally return to this place in times of stress. By experiencing one particular visualization repeatedly, you strengthen its effect on you.

Imagine that you are holding an infant in your arms, and that this infant is you. Use this visualization as a way of emotionally nurturing yourself.

Imagine that you are surrounded by a warm blanket or a protective shield. Surround yourself with this comfortable barrier, and imagine that you are sheltered from those things which are causing you stress.

Laughing and Crying

One of the primary ingredients of stress and emotional upset is physical tension. This tension can be relieved with laughter or tears. Laughter and crying seem like two sides of the same coin. Both involve the sudden release of built up pressure and both are very physical responses to emotional experiences.

Slowing Down

Stress relief occurs when you interrupt your usual overwhelming and hectic activities and thought processes, and experience unhurried moments of silence. Consequently, I would not recommend reading a book during these activities or engaging in any other mental occupation, because quiet moments are the key to maintaining mental strength and stability. After all, I think this is a natural state. A show on the Discovery channel mentioned that "lions spend up to 20 hours a day in repose."

Relaxing Activities

Bubble Bath

Resting in warm water is very peaceful. Try lighting a candle or playing some instrumental music.

Warm Drink

Try sitting in a comfortable chair with a warm drink, such as tea or hot chocolate (but avoid coffee).

Sit In the Sun

Find an outdoor chair and sit in the sun. It's simple, but most people don't pause long enough on a sunny day to really soak it in. The combination of fresh air, natural surroundings, warmth, and light is a powerful, stress relieving concoction.

Drawing

If you don't feel pressured to produce a masterpiece, some time with a sketch pad and crayons or colored pencils is relaxing and cathartic. Use dark, heavy colors to express your anguish or anger. Use light, soft strokes for a calming effect. Draw symbols of your emotions and surround them with comforting colors and shapes. Depending on your disposition, experiment or draw something nearby.

Music

Find a music tape or compact disc with songs that have a rhythm you like and a lot of harmony between the melodies. Harmony is extremely relaxing because it gives you a predictable pattern of stimuli to focus on. In fact, a particular area of the brain, the reticular formation, has been associated with the analysis of stimulus patterns. It is believed to be responsible for the calming effect you receive when all your senses correspond to each other. For example, dance clubs often include a large video screen with images that move with the beat of the music, and this helps to provoke pleasant emotions.

Exercise

Paradoxically, exercise can increase your energy levels. This may relieve the exhaustion you experience when stressed out. I read at the website, Stress Assess, that "exercise triggers the release of hormones which signal your body to return to your normal relaxed state." When I researched exercise and fitness, I was looking for a chart detailing the amount and type of exercise that people should be getting according to age, weight, and other factors. Instead, I found a lot of conflicting advice, which depended on whether one wanted to lose weight, bulk up, or prepare for a marathon. One piece of advice, however, hit home. The amount of exercise you should get to keep yourself from feeling fatigued and tense is the amount that makes you feel good. Walking was repeatedly recommended, and it is relaxing, and it does not tax your body as much as jogging.